Currently viewing the tag: "weight loss coach"

This is the prime week for weight loss depression in the United States.  Dead of winter, resolutions a thing of the past… reality sets in.  Weight loss can feel hard.  Goals can seem F…A…R… away.

Needless to day, a weight loss coach hears these things a lot.  But, the failure or lack of original gusto for a weight loss resolution doesn’t have to be “hard” or “depressing.”  It doesn’t even have to suck the life out of your energy.

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It’s all a question of perspective.

What bothers most people about weight loss is that it doesn’t happen quickly enough.  And, if we switch perspectives, that’s a fantastic fact.

Quick weight loss comes back. If your weight loss is slow, it’s much more likely to be permanent.  I’ve been helping clients lose weight for over 10 years, and I’ve done it myself – I’ve lost almost 100 lbs. and next month will mark 13 years I’ve sustained that weight loss.  I’ve been able to see what makes people successful:

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Today, I celebrate 12 years of sustained weight loss.  If you are new to this blog, after years of yo-yo dieting, I set out to lose weight permanently.  My initial weight loss of 74 pounds was an incredible journey for me, an education in life I never expected.

After losing that weight, I was determined to “keep” the results.  I knew from my research that permanent weight loss is defined by the medical profession as weight loss sustained for 5 years and more.  I also knew, sadly, it is very rarely achieved.

I had to keep learning and growing in order to maintain the weight loss.  In the last two years, I’ve lost more weight.  Today, I’m 92 lbs. lighter.

As I was thinking about this anniversary, it occurred to me that I got what I wanted.  How many times can you say you got exactly what you wanted (and more) in life?

I don’t call it amazing anymore, because I know the work that was involved.  It’s no miracle.  I literally “grew myself up” out of food addiction.  I found, for me, most addiction theories don’t work.  To me, they just get a person addicted to a program, instead of freeing them from the addiction.

In essence, the entire medical and therapeutic community says, “You are damaged and will always be addicted.  Here, be addicted to this, which we deem healthier, rather than that substance (food, alcohol, drug, sex).

That just didn’t work for me.

What I wanted was freedom.  Freedom was a huge value and driver of my behavior.  In fact, as a weight loss coach, it’s something I hear practically every day from a client, or two, or three.

“I just want to be free to eat what I want.”

It’s perhaps the most common derailer of the average diet, and why diets don’t work long-term.  When I was in the throes of addiction, the minute anyone told me “you can’t eat that” or “at your weight, is that wise?”, you could be damned sure I was going to eat it!  That’s the freedom value showing up.

Well, today, I am free.  I’m free of the compulsivity of addiction, feeling as though my actions are occurring without my permission.

I am free of excess weight, which hindered my movement, my self-expression, my comfort in the world.

I’m free of a host of medical problems.

I’m free of my excess weight making, refusing or coloring decisions for me.

Once I grew up, I discovered huge gifts:   Choice.  Opportunities.  Meaning.  Connection.  Self-esteem.  Love.

And true freedom.

Here in the U.S., it’s Thanksgiving week.  All around me, I’m hearing a collective intake of breath:  those who eat, those who do not eat, those who eat by rules, and those who eat in disordered patterns — they are all in a panic.

Thanksgiving is feared by anyone who isn’t living in a peaceful relationship with food.  Laden with high-fat, high caloric food, it’s a celebration of abundance that Americans translate into plenty of food.

Celebrate your happy body.

We could celebrate the abundance of ingenuity, fun, humor, love or… just about anything… but we have translated it into food.  Too funny, when you think about it.  What if we celebrated an abundance of energy and lined the highways, exercising all day?

Hmmmm.

Don’t mind me, my mind just works that way.  As I direct my thoughts towards the past 15 years of my life as I have lost weight (and not refound it), I find myself grateful for many things this Thanksgiving:

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Weight loss takes time.  I’m often asked to define the best loss rate.  My answer is:  “The best rate is what your body and mind will allow.  It will take as long as it takes YOU.”

There are natural restrictions on what your body will release in terms of weight.  If you are careful to burn fat and nothing else (optimal because the body fights back when other elements of the body are threatened), you will release as much as your body can process.  The process of burning fat is quite complicated, and doesn’t happen as efficiently as burning some butter on your stove – misunderstanding this is a big reason most people never achieve permanent weight loss.

The Scale Can't Tell What's Going on Inside the Body

Did you know that, if you could burn one pound of fat in a day (and you can’t), it would take

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No, I’m not talking about her skimpy outfits or the skinny half-naked dancers flanking her live shows.

Lady Gaga is the most famous woman in music/culture right now, and I don’t think it’s because of her music (although it’s quite good) – it’s because of her message. Music is only part of her life played out as performance art.

Her deeper message to her “little monsters” (her fans) is screw everyone if they don’t like you, be who you are, because, no matter what that might be, that’s perfect.

Lady Gaga at the 2011 Grammy Awards

Lady Gaga at the 2011 Grammy Awards

What’s the connection to weight loss? Listen to

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Having traveled my own quite complicated journey out of body hatred and losing over 70 lbs permanently, I’ve come to believe every body is different and unique, though we’re led by society/culture to believe their is a “standard.” I’ve had the experience of coaching hundreds of women towards their own unique “optimal” weight, and discovered we all lose weight at different rates (and, yes, in different places!).

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Loving and appreciating our own distinctiveness isn’t the easy road in our society, but it can be done.

I once had a client lose weight at a rate of a pound a month, and be upset

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It’s rare that we meet someone who is truly giving in this world. And so sad when the world loses such a person.

Today, I learned that a colleague of mine, a pioneer ADD coach, passed away. His name was Ken Zaretzky and he was truly a champion of coaching and coaches. He was a beautiful, open, painfully honest, caring man who loved to see coaches succeed. I first met him in one of my coach training courses, and he truly delighted in my success as a coach and businesswoman.

He would call me and say, “I just wanted you to know I heard you’re doing great things for your clients.” I never knew where he heard that (this was long before social media) but I was so touched he wanted me to hear good things.

He had this habit of giving money to people.

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I’m just back from a conference focused on scientific studies about change where I heard a repetitive chant: “People Don’t Change.”

I’ll acknowledge there are studies that show most patients who encounter life threatening conditions return to old behaviors that caused the problem in the first place. Hence, the red meat seduces the heart patient. Nicotine lures the smoker. Permanent weight loss is rare as weight comes back to the dieter.

SilhouettesBeach

I know some people don’t care to change, or it is too threatening to them to do so. Yes, living without food as a soother, friend or emotional barrier can be scarier than death.

I fit that picture once.

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